Your Good Name

It’s cage-match time:
Socrates vs teen-age wisdom, (aka “Why you should care” vs “Who cares?”)

I came across this quote from the Master Philosopher, and I really, really, really want the children to embrace it, beginning immediately, and let it inform a large percentage of their behavior.

Here it is: 
“Regard your good name as the richest jewel you can possibly be possessed of... The way to gain a good reputation is to endeavor to be what you desire to appear.” (Socarates)

Selling this as a good thing is an uphill climb, especially as “your good name” is subject to personal interpretation.  Some might say having a “good name” means having lots of social media “likes” or a having large following.  It could mean fifteen minutes of fame, starring in a viral video. 

But a good name isn't any of those.

What I would like my children to understand is a good name is what others say about you...not what you say about yourself.  And what others say about you is based, just a little, on what you SAY, but most of what others say is based on what you DO. 

Take any person you know only slightly.  Now, what do you know about this person's reputation?  Reputation words are behavior words.  It's not what they say (you might not even have heard them speak directly), it's what they do.

I've always wondered about people who seem eager to introduce their credentials into a conversation as early as possible; sort of a "Head's up, you should listen to what I have to say, because I'm X,Y and Z."  It feels a bit forced, as if to say, "I tell you, I have a good name and a good reputation, so no need to exert yourself deciding if I'm the real deal."

"Who cares?" any teen (and some adults) asks. 
"Aren't we supposed to not care what people think?"

Well, none of us can control what others think.  Ask any exhausted people-pleaser, whose efforts never seem to be enough.  Or the critical micro-manager.  Regardless of what others think or say, consistently doing things to make one's own corner of the world more pleasant, peaceful and predictable for all DOES matter, in a way the simple pursuit of fame (or infamy) does not. 

What words do you want to come to mind when people hear your name?
Go do those.  It's slow going at times, but at the end of your hard work is the richest jewel you can possibly be possessed of:  your good name.