Never "Too Busy" For You

This started out as a New Year's resolution for 2014, but I quickly decided to abandon that rather ephemeral concept in favor of something more concrete:  modeling the behavior I would like to see in others.  This used to be called The Golden Rule, but that phrase comes with its own connotations and sounds so...all encompassing.  I'm going for something specific.

This year, 2014, I plan to strike the word "busy" from my interactions with others, in hopes that they will do the same for me.  I always recoil slightly from the Christmas newsletters that begin "This has been a very busy year for us!" and the implication that the lives of others have not also been overfilled with.....well, with something.  Then, the listing of activities and accomplishments, interspersed with "And when Iphigenia has a free moment, she likes to hone her desert-trekking skills...".  I've been guilty of this as well, partly out of misplaced pride and partly out of desire to not appear unable to keep up with the Jonses and the Smiths.  But not this year.

I had several days this year (ok, many days this year), where execution of all the commitments depended on split-second timing, a good tailwind and no traffic.  No room for error.  I don't recall feeling terribly virtuous or improved at the end of those days, just exhausted, and with some potential "bragging rights" for social media, once I recovered.  Busy, busy days.

I've since decided, that at least in Linda's world, busy-ness will heretofore be renamed Poor Time Management and/or Failure to be Forthright, and treated as a deficiency, rather than a badge of honor.  Having a foot cast for two weeks really helped to jump-start this process, as I had to stop and think before I did anything, to decide whether or not it was even physically possible with crutches and whether or not it would simply take more time than I wanted to spend.   My vindication, of sorts, came in the last week of the children's school, when the parent association collects checks and monetary gifts for teachers, divides them, creates a card and distributes the cards and money.  There was a timing glitch (possibly resulting from people being busy), and the division and distribution of money came right down to the last second.  Even though the process did not go at all as planned, it turned out that day was free for me, although I grumbled several times under my breath during the course of it.  At the distribution time, I was floored at the relief in so many teachers' voices.  They were counting on that gift.

Here's what it looks like for 2014:  I will make every effort to not dismiss anyone with "I'm too busy."  I'll tell them what I'm doing instead, including keeping margins for error.  If someone suggests an activity that doesn't interest me, I'll either suck it up for the good of the relationship and make an effort to enjoy myself, or say, "Thank you for asking me!  That isn't going to fit into my schedule" (no need to be brutal).  My hope is for improved relationships, a chance to fully focus on what I'm doing and memories that are sharp instead of blurred.   Happy New Year!